I am writing this after having been woken up in the middle of the night by a message that has to come out to humanity, NOW.
And of course, none of this is new information. It is, and always has been, the human right, and the human responsibility, to live out enlightenment. To bring forth Buddhahood. To let it be so that "it is not I that lives, but Christ that lives in me."
To live this way--fully obedient to the Divine nature--is actually no sacrifice at all. It is actually complete freedom.
You have only to look around you to see that the world is doing it all wrong. America is "the greatest nation in the world"--when it comes to the number of people from other countries that we've killed throughout history. It's possible that my numbers are off--I haven't actually done the math. The math doesn't actually matter. What matters is this: why is the Holocaust called barbaric in the history books (not that it wasn't, because it was horrible), whereas dropping atomic bombs on Hiroshima and Nagasaki is called heroic? Why have we been in a recession since 2001? We are doing it all wrong by sourcing our lives from what's coming at us from outside--from the fear and scarcity that seems to surround us, rather than sourcing our lives from what lies within--love, abundance, and Divine nature.* We are doing it all wrong because we have been led astray--whether by politicians who are bought and sold by corporations, or by religious authorities who figured out that people will give them money if they think they'll otherwise go to hell. Follow the money trail. Follow the agenda of the people you are receiving information from. Who are they working for? Who are they beholden to? Better yet, follow your own intuition. because it cannot be bought or sold by anyone.
I say this, despite the fact that I'm an intuitive artist and practitioner, and therefore would probably be out of a job if everyone knew how to follow their own intuition. It's no longer time to hoard knowledge and sell skills--it is time to share freely. Why? Because we are fucked if we do not! It is a law of the universe that you get back what you give--it is no secret!
There is an ultimate answer to everything. I can't tell you what it is and neither can anyone else--and anyone who tells you that they can is trying to sell something. This is another human right and responsibility--to source Truth FROM WITHIN. This is a right NO ONE CAN EVER take away from you. They may be able, by widespread trickery and propaganda, to prevent you from KNOWING that you have this right. But no one can take it from you, EVER. Even death cannot stop you from going directly to the Source of Truth.
The inner world is about to become the outer world. The End Times are upon us. This doesn't mean Armageddon, stars falling from the sky onto earth and everyone dying--but it does mean the end of the old way of living, and the death of beliefs and traditions that no longer serve. Look--really deeply look--at the Bible, the Quran, the Lotus Sutra--really, any holy book that has ever been written. Look at the individuals, organizations, ministries committed to speaking, teaching, and living the truth. Look at the processes of nature itself. The sources are endless. Better yet, look at your own self, the deepest reaches thereof--however you arrive at your own understanding.
It's your job, and absolutely no one else's, to create the world that you are going to live in. Start now. Start with a clear intention. Everything you need will come your way. Knowing what you want with unwavering faith, you can create miraculous change. You can tell a mountain to go jump into the sea, and it will totally do so.
<3 and <3,
Linmayu
*Of course, not everyone is screwing it all up. Just a lot of people. You already know whether or not you fall into that category.
Sunday, October 31, 2010
Friday, July 23, 2010
Day 73--Red Dragon
20 days later I'm logically following the same thread from the previous post. A lot has happened through my work at LFAC.
Actually, very little has happened through my work. A lot has happened through the practice of chanting Nam-myoho-renge-kyo for 5 hours a day, which we will continue until August 12. Chanting Nam-myoho-renge-kyo, as well as other practices, bring us directly into vibration with the Divine, so that we may download true wisdom from the universe.
And such wisdom came to me with regards to the problem of my loneliness.
I was once Linmayu Most Damned, but now I am Linmayu Red Dragon. The appellation "Red Dragon" belongs to my nonphysical lover; it was once an alternate name for an actual person so that I wouldn't say his name in print, but it evolved to stand for the masculine entity within myself.
But screw that. The name, and the power it suggests, are mine. I do not have to look to another for the source of my power when it has been inside me all along.
As far as the "him" in question, it came to me within a day of chanting that yes, I do desire a connection with him--on every level--and furthermore, that this possibility is not closed to me as I thought it was. I have realized that though he is incredibly attractive, he is not out of my league. If that was the case, I certainly wouldn't have had the experience just 4 days ago of being flirted with by someone ten times more handsome than he.
However, in order to make this longing bear fruit, I cannot go on as I have. I cannot continue to put myself one-down and put him on a pedestal, as this unattainable love-god. In fact, I cannot continue to give him energy or thought at all--I need that energy and thought for myself and my own work! I can't inspire anyone to love if all I have to offer is sycophantic admiration. As a woman, what I have to offer is simply my being--which actually is never offered, but must be requested. My friend said to me recently, "It doesn't matter how powerful he is; you're still the woman."
Yes. I am a woman. Not a "misbegotten male" as we were once thought to be.
I am radiant.
I am beauty.
I am inspiration.
I am love.
These things are inherent in all womankind--not distributed only to the few who grace the magazine covers. In fact, ordinary women are often far more powerful in love than the world's great beauties. This is because the inner person is always more powerful than the outer person, and prevails when the two are in conflict.
Actually, very little has happened through my work. A lot has happened through the practice of chanting Nam-myoho-renge-kyo for 5 hours a day, which we will continue until August 12. Chanting Nam-myoho-renge-kyo, as well as other practices, bring us directly into vibration with the Divine, so that we may download true wisdom from the universe.
And such wisdom came to me with regards to the problem of my loneliness.
I was once Linmayu Most Damned, but now I am Linmayu Red Dragon. The appellation "Red Dragon" belongs to my nonphysical lover; it was once an alternate name for an actual person so that I wouldn't say his name in print, but it evolved to stand for the masculine entity within myself.
But screw that. The name, and the power it suggests, are mine. I do not have to look to another for the source of my power when it has been inside me all along.
As far as the "him" in question, it came to me within a day of chanting that yes, I do desire a connection with him--on every level--and furthermore, that this possibility is not closed to me as I thought it was. I have realized that though he is incredibly attractive, he is not out of my league. If that was the case, I certainly wouldn't have had the experience just 4 days ago of being flirted with by someone ten times more handsome than he.
However, in order to make this longing bear fruit, I cannot go on as I have. I cannot continue to put myself one-down and put him on a pedestal, as this unattainable love-god. In fact, I cannot continue to give him energy or thought at all--I need that energy and thought for myself and my own work! I can't inspire anyone to love if all I have to offer is sycophantic admiration. As a woman, what I have to offer is simply my being--which actually is never offered, but must be requested. My friend said to me recently, "It doesn't matter how powerful he is; you're still the woman."
Yes. I am a woman. Not a "misbegotten male" as we were once thought to be.
I am radiant.
I am beauty.
I am inspiration.
I am love.
These things are inherent in all womankind--not distributed only to the few who grace the magazine covers. In fact, ordinary women are often far more powerful in love than the world's great beauties. This is because the inner person is always more powerful than the outer person, and prevails when the two are in conflict.
Sunday, July 4, 2010
day 54...feeling crushed
And for some reason I feel absolutely defeated and crushed today, even though I won a HUGE spiritual victory in regards to my financial situation. I prayed to receive some money that was due me, and received an answer--in meatspace--immediately.
So why the hell do I feel so bad? Why so lethargic today? Why do I feel defeated, and like just behind my eyes is a dammed river of tears?
Because I am lonely. There are people in my life--countless people--and I must have joined at least ten Meetup groups today--but it is an energy of seeking what I don't have, and not of celebrating what I do. I spent time with my family today and it felt the same--as though I was desperately seeking fulfillment from their company, rather than enjoying the fact that I already had it.
This is all well and good intellectually, but I need communion with my Lord--in the now time.
So why the hell do I feel so bad? Why so lethargic today? Why do I feel defeated, and like just behind my eyes is a dammed river of tears?
Because I am lonely. There are people in my life--countless people--and I must have joined at least ten Meetup groups today--but it is an energy of seeking what I don't have, and not of celebrating what I do. I spent time with my family today and it felt the same--as though I was desperately seeking fulfillment from their company, rather than enjoying the fact that I already had it.
This is all well and good intellectually, but I need communion with my Lord--in the now time.
Thursday, July 1, 2010
Day 51--death and a dream of rebirth
No matter how many times a dancer takes the stage, there is always that deep seed of doubt and fear. The worry that she will fail--that her body will not carry the message she is meant to convey to her audience.
It's not an irrational fear. In some situations in ancient Hawaii, one mistake in a hula called for the dancer's immediate death. I am feeling the same dire circumstances surrounding tonight's performance. If I hold back in any way--if I do not fully surrender my body to Spirit--I will die. Or rather, I will fail to give birth to that which I contain. And that would be a living death.
So right now, in this moment, I am ready to fight, tooth and nail, every demon and every adversary that needs to be fought.
I saw in the mirror a face that was of neither side of my ancestry. A geisha face and a samurai face and a Buddha face. My real face?
Some of the Dahn masters have gone to Korea on a two-week meditation tour. I feel as though brothers and sons are going to war. Truly, these men and women deserve the honor due warriors--going to distant lands to do battle with the true enemy, the adversary within. And I long to join them, though I do not know if I can, being this age.
It is only a matter of time before I do join them. I feel it in my 2nd and 3rd chakras, so strongly. But first, the current battlefield...
It's not an irrational fear. In some situations in ancient Hawaii, one mistake in a hula called for the dancer's immediate death. I am feeling the same dire circumstances surrounding tonight's performance. If I hold back in any way--if I do not fully surrender my body to Spirit--I will die. Or rather, I will fail to give birth to that which I contain. And that would be a living death.
So right now, in this moment, I am ready to fight, tooth and nail, every demon and every adversary that needs to be fought.
I saw in the mirror a face that was of neither side of my ancestry. A geisha face and a samurai face and a Buddha face. My real face?
Some of the Dahn masters have gone to Korea on a two-week meditation tour. I feel as though brothers and sons are going to war. Truly, these men and women deserve the honor due warriors--going to distant lands to do battle with the true enemy, the adversary within. And I long to join them, though I do not know if I can, being this age.
It is only a matter of time before I do join them. I feel it in my 2nd and 3rd chakras, so strongly. But first, the current battlefield...
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Day 50--from bad to WTF
Today was a day of high tension. I left work way early because I couldn't stand to be there trying to pull random passersby in the door when I knew deep inside I needed to be doing something else. Was I just running away from my recurring problem of the fear of promoting myself? Quite possibly.
While chanting nam-myoho-renge-kyo with Joan this morning, I kept getting that I need to stand on my own two feet, completely, as a professional artist, teacher, healer, and everything else that I do--that I can't be anyone's employee anymore. I haven't quit working for her, though. I asked for the rest of the week off to make that decision. It's a big one and I need to make sure that I'm right, and that I have at least a snowball's chance in hell of surviving! I need to check out the opportunity I've found and make sure it isn't going to 1) be impossible or 2) send most of my money to someone else.
In addition, I kept getting that I need to renew myself energetically, so that I can attract more money energy. I got the same message last night from both my father and my yoga master, so I'm pretty sure it's the right one. Joan and I were both talking about how do we attract clientele with more money to spend? Neither of us really had a clue. I tend to avoid people who have a lot of money, and with good reason--everyone I know who has a lot of money seems to be focused on getting some of mine!
Is it even possible to have money without greed? Is it possible to have enough, to just be satisfied? All I see is the two extremes: people like myself struggling tooth and nail, while those who have figured it out position themselves over us to take what little we have for themselves. I do not want to become one of those greedy mofos--but I'm not keen on starving, either!
There is, as always, a middle road, which I was seeking in my decision to allow Google ads on the blog. If the ads that showed up were actually relevant to what I'm writing, then I'd quite possibly be helping my readers MORE by displaying them. They seem to be at least semi-relevant, though I'm seeing ads for modalities such as Reiki that I have not studied and honestly probably won't. So, I can't knowledgeably recommend these things. I wish there were some way to control what shows up with greater accuracy.
However, in another sense, there is no middle road. The controversial Bible verse, Matthew 13:12, is actually the truth when it comes to finances: "Whoever has will be given more, and he will have an abundance. Whoever does not have, even what he has will be taken from him." When I was working in the customer service department for a large bank, I observed this in great detail. This particular bank marketed its services to lower-income individuals--and created its rules in such a way that people had to be EXTREMELY careful to avoid getting caught in a never-ending downward spiral of overdraft fees.
Anyway, though, that's the law of attraction at work. It's just the way things are, and it's best to learn how to work with it.
While chanting nam-myoho-renge-kyo with Joan this morning, I kept getting that I need to stand on my own two feet, completely, as a professional artist, teacher, healer, and everything else that I do--that I can't be anyone's employee anymore. I haven't quit working for her, though. I asked for the rest of the week off to make that decision. It's a big one and I need to make sure that I'm right, and that I have at least a snowball's chance in hell of surviving! I need to check out the opportunity I've found and make sure it isn't going to 1) be impossible or 2) send most of my money to someone else.
In addition, I kept getting that I need to renew myself energetically, so that I can attract more money energy. I got the same message last night from both my father and my yoga master, so I'm pretty sure it's the right one. Joan and I were both talking about how do we attract clientele with more money to spend? Neither of us really had a clue. I tend to avoid people who have a lot of money, and with good reason--everyone I know who has a lot of money seems to be focused on getting some of mine!
Is it even possible to have money without greed? Is it possible to have enough, to just be satisfied? All I see is the two extremes: people like myself struggling tooth and nail, while those who have figured it out position themselves over us to take what little we have for themselves. I do not want to become one of those greedy mofos--but I'm not keen on starving, either!
There is, as always, a middle road, which I was seeking in my decision to allow Google ads on the blog. If the ads that showed up were actually relevant to what I'm writing, then I'd quite possibly be helping my readers MORE by displaying them. They seem to be at least semi-relevant, though I'm seeing ads for modalities such as Reiki that I have not studied and honestly probably won't. So, I can't knowledgeably recommend these things. I wish there were some way to control what shows up with greater accuracy.
However, in another sense, there is no middle road. The controversial Bible verse, Matthew 13:12, is actually the truth when it comes to finances: "Whoever has will be given more, and he will have an abundance. Whoever does not have, even what he has will be taken from him." When I was working in the customer service department for a large bank, I observed this in great detail. This particular bank marketed its services to lower-income individuals--and created its rules in such a way that people had to be EXTREMELY careful to avoid getting caught in a never-ending downward spiral of overdraft fees.
Anyway, though, that's the law of attraction at work. It's just the way things are, and it's best to learn how to work with it.
Monday, June 28, 2010
Day 48--an unlikely blessing
So. Today I woke up just like any other morning, and got in the car to go to work, and when I started driving, I heard a horrible screeching sound coming from the back of my car. Upon getting out to check it, I discovered my muffler was dragging on the ground. Not good! So I called AAA, only to be informed that even though my membership card said it was valid until 8/31/10, it actually wasn't valid due to my change in marital status. OK, no problem. I could renew it via my credit card; I still had way more than $57 available on there (though I'd certainly be maxed out after the upcoming car repairs).
Hmm, not so much. Turns out because of some problem with the bank, I'm unable to use my card for anything until tomorrow. So, I could neither get my car fixed today, nor could I go to work.
Actually, I was somewhat relieved by the whole situation. Part of me had been dreading going into work today, even though I love my job. I think I just really needed the day to regroup, refocus, chant Nam-myoho-renge-kyo, and devote some serious effort to consciously creating my future.
Tomorrow will be back to the beloved grind, but I'm thankful I was forced to take the time to reset my sails today.
What about you? Was there a time when something bad happened to you and it turned out to be a huge blessing?
Hmm, not so much. Turns out because of some problem with the bank, I'm unable to use my card for anything until tomorrow. So, I could neither get my car fixed today, nor could I go to work.
Actually, I was somewhat relieved by the whole situation. Part of me had been dreading going into work today, even though I love my job. I think I just really needed the day to regroup, refocus, chant Nam-myoho-renge-kyo, and devote some serious effort to consciously creating my future.
Tomorrow will be back to the beloved grind, but I'm thankful I was forced to take the time to reset my sails today.
What about you? Was there a time when something bad happened to you and it turned out to be a huge blessing?
Sunday, June 27, 2010
Day 47
Just a short blurb for today, but I've apparently become part of the Urban Loli Experiment* today! :D With a body like this, that's probably the closest I'll get to the modeling world...unless it isn't! I'm working hard on my physical fitness after all...so only time will tell!
I don't really have any desire to be a professional model, but I love to express myself through fashion. And, due to certain circumstances, my time left to do so may be limited! So, I hope to get as many good photoshoots done as possible in the time I do have.
*YEAH, it's probably just because the lady responsible for Urban Loli is my dear friend Grace! But, to me, it is all Divine providence. There are all sorts of amazing things coming into being through our friendship, many of which I hope to write about in future posts or in the book!
I don't really have any desire to be a professional model, but I love to express myself through fashion. And, due to certain circumstances, my time left to do so may be limited! So, I hope to get as many good photoshoots done as possible in the time I do have.
*YEAH, it's probably just because the lady responsible for Urban Loli is my dear friend Grace! But, to me, it is all Divine providence. There are all sorts of amazing things coming into being through our friendship, many of which I hope to write about in future posts or in the book!
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